Stephen Colbert attacks Yellowstone Grizzlies; bears fight back

On Wednesday night, Stephen Colbert launched yet another cowardly assault on grizzly bears, naming them the number one threat on his “Threatdown,” and encouraging viewers to shoot pine beetles in order to keep Yellowstone’s grizzly bears off the endangered species list.

 But this time the bears were prepared—and have launched an ongoing campaign against Colbert’s harassment. “He’s been persecuting us relentlessly for years,” said a bear spokesperson. “We taken our message to the people and feel confident they’ll see through his cowardice once they know the truth.”

 The bears recently staged a protest against Stephen Colbert and posted a video on YouTube that exposes his lies. “Thousands of visitors come to Yellowstone every day and for the most part coexist peacefully with the bears. Picnic baskets haven’t been stolen in decades.”

 The grizzly bears in Yellowstone face threats from climate change as warmer temperatures have allowed a beetle that destroys the whitebark pine tree to thrive. The whitebark pine provides a primary food source for grizzly bears because of its high nutritional value. NRDC senior wildlife advocate Louisa Wilcox states: “If these trees go, they could take Yellowstone’s grizzlies and a lot of America’s western forests with them.” 

The bears keep issuing a challenge to Colbert to visit Yellowstone and confront his unwarranted fears, but so far the news host has ignored their requests, which has made the bears critical of his alleged ‘manliness.’ “He claims to be a proud American, but we think he’s a coward and unpatriotic for not wanting to visit America’s first national park. President Obama was not afraid.”

Watch the bears' protest video below: